In 2007, more than 500,000 American lives were prematurely extinguished by cancer, a statistic that Nashvillian Sheila Bates knows well. “I call it going to Cancerland,” says Bates, whose father died of lung cancer at age 47; she was 23. “My life was irrevocably changed.”

Ten years later, as a young mother and wife, Bates took her second trip to Cancerland when her husband was diagnosed with lung cancer at 40; she was 33. “He had a poor prognosis,” she says, “but he lived a year.” It was through these experiences that she realized how very fragile life is. “If you’ve gone there (Cancerland), your outlook on life is different.”

An Idea was Born
The Manager of Community Outreach at Vanderbilt-Ingram Cancer Center and a former oncology social worker, Bates now adds to her resumé “life coach” for a new program offered by The Minnie Pearl Cancer Foundation (TMPCF): Life Coaching for Living Beyond Cancer. Bates completed 160 hours of classroom training as well as six months of formal coaching supervision to obtain accreditation through the International Coach Federation. Now a certified life coach, Bates spends two days each week helping cancer survivors regain control of their lives.
     “The whole landscape of cancer treatment is different,” Bates says. “People are surviving, but it comes with issues.” Fatigue and other long-term side effects are quite common, but priorities change as well ... survivors often don’t want to live life the same way.
     “What I noticed was that often the earlier the diagnosis, the more life-changing it was,” says Susan Gregory, an oncology social worker at TMPCF, who co-created the program with Bates. “That’s not to say that survivors can’t get past it, but sometimes they get stuck. Then they need someone to say, ‘What do you want to do? What steps can you take?’”
     “I call it ‘living on purpose,’” says Bates, referring to the deliberate way survivors often lead their lives once in remission. Sometimes, though, figuring out how to lead a different life proves difficult, which is where Bates comes in. The new — and free — program, which is made possible by the Lance Armstrong Foundation through a recently awarded grant to TMPCF, addresses these questions. Once a week for six weeks, Bates helps her clients figure out how to get their lives headed in their direction of choice. “We say, ‘OK, here’s my goal. How can I make that happen?’” Together, she and her clients create recipes for achievement, and Bates tosses in a dash of accountability for good measure. By setting specific goals and dates by which they should be achieved, the clients are more apt to be proactive. “It’s not Sheila telling them what to do,” says Gregory. “It’s them figuring out what they want to do and how to do it. It’s Sheila who holds the accountability.”
     Areas each client assesses include finances, environment (home, work, etc.), stress management, nutrition/exercise, relationships, self-esteem and health. They place values on their satisfaction with each of these areas — what is OK, what needs work — and then they set to work on the “blueprint for change,” as Bates calls it.
    She recalls a young man who was diagnosed in college, and treatment forced him to drop out temporarily. Once he completed his undergraduate degree, she met with him and asked him what he wanted to do. “He wanted to go to grad school,” remembers Bates. “I asked him, ‘Well, how do you get there?’ We made a list of all of the things, which includes making an  application. Then his accountability was getting an application,  completing it and submitting it. So it can be that tiny.” The young man did go to grad school and is on his directed path.
     It’s not an, “I need to change this or that,” but rather, “I want to change this or that.” The difference between the two — “need” versus “want” — is their readiness. And, Bates, who is always ready, cheers them on every step of the way. “It’s so powerful and fascinating because it’s their thing,” beams Bates. “Coaching is not therapy. We don’t get into the past. The past is their story. We’re here today, and they’re here to move forward.”

A Life Changed
At 54, Terry Kornman, while caring for her daughter who had a brain tumor, was herself diagnosed with very early stage ovarian cancer. “I’d been having all sorts of female problems for years,” says Kornman, “and I didn’t want to go through a hysterectomy.” But when she finally had no other choice, instead of feeling relief, Kornman instead faced cancer. “They found the cancer by accident, she says. “It was microscopic.”
     After six chemotherapy treatments of her own while simultaneously caring for her daughter, Kornman is in remission. But her treatment didn’t come without obstacles. “I had to cut back on my work,” she explains. “The treatment affected my bones, and I had neuropathy really bad in my fingers.” Finally, after about a year, she started feeling alright physically, but her life wasn’t necessarily where she wanted it. “After my daughter was diagnosed, I was so depressed. My house ... my physical surroundings ... were a disaster area,” she says. “I just did what I had to do, and when you do that for years and years, it becomes so overwhelming to get your surroundings in order that I just didn’t do it.”
Kornman, a talented artist and creative spirit, longed to get back to her artistry, but couldn’t because of the disarray in her home. “I had been wanting to do life coaching,” she says, but Internet searches and inquiring phone calls lead her to expensive, out-of-reach options. When she heard about Life Coaching for Living Beyond Cancer, Kornman knew she’d found the answer. After meeting with Certified Life Coach Sheila Bates, she began setting goals and accomplishing the tasks at hand.
     “The first accountability was to put up a shelf,” says Bates, “and she took it and ran!” Kornman hung shelves and put up peg board. “I really started doing the things I needed to do to get my arts and crafts area organized,” she says. Her life back in order, Kornman is happier now. Her daughter is tumor-free, she’s cancer-free, and she has a workspace that allows her creative expression ... a testament to positive change.